Life Gives You Lemonades At the Cabin of Shadows

The Society gathered at the Hidden Cabin 24th - 26th of August 2012 Anno Domini

Once again the Society left the civilized world behind them and retreated to the Hidden Realm where men are still men and women are non-heard. Journey to the Hidden Realm was ethereal, accompanied by tunes gathered by Lord Protector Jakubias. It was unanimously decided that his Collection of Otherwordly tunes was probably one of the worsts, ever.

As they arrived, they began with the arrangements necessary for the session to last over the whole weekend. When they finally were ready, the Session began. As the ritual insists, the gents firstly punished themselves with the paragon of rpg's, Dungeons & Dragons. This year the planetary alignment was favorable, as they began their new "To The North" campaign. First night of gameplay proved the new campaign setup as an intriguing experience.

With a proper cliffhanger, the gentlemen proceeded from the rpg to the nightly rituals of drinking. This time however, they decided to take it easy in order to ensure a good gaming experience next day. A cinematic video was watched, and this time it was titled as "Your Highness". A nice film. Enjoy the trailer.

After a night of restless sleep, the gaming ensued. It lasted whole twelve hours, and the new campaign was officially started with a bang. Please take a look:

The Game

The Cabin

The Atmosphere

Eventually it was time to call it quits. But that meant alcohol. The gents washed themselves at sauna in order to prepare themselves to the MEAT FEAST. Please take a look:

After stuffing themselves with delicious meat, the men regrouped back to the cabin to challenge themselves in Köning und Neger . The game was bizarre, and many drinks were drank. Here's a clean edit of a certain "victory chart" document that prevailed that night:

The Dynasties: 

Jakubias  William 

!Grudgematch! William  Jakubias 

Sovereign King Jaaaku..   He who will win the goon wars   William 

Masamund -> Count Oscar the Superneger 

Again - Jakubias 

-----------------/----------/------------------ 

Kungen King Jannek HE GAVE UP 

----------------/----------/-------------------

And now the shit goes really weird:

Oscar the King EXCEPT he aint but WILLIAM 

Masamund's Dynasty I - won the Neger-Oscar- The LEMON LORD 

Dickie-Doo-Masamund - Masamund's Dynasty II £$2@# Jannek 

Jannek 

Masamund's Dynasty III * punoit* 

Masamund's Dynasty IV %$#£ Number 2. 

Willy-Oscar 

Willy Oscar's number two - - - - - -    Neger-William :( 

Jannektikon the Emperor Goon-Willy-Oscar 

Jannek 

Jannek Masamund

And on the other side of the manuscript:

THE BOOKKEEPER JAKUBIAS IS A GAY SHEEPFUCKER WITH GNOME-FORESKIN!!!

What a splendid journey. Here's scenic picture of Natalie Portman's ass, best thing about movie Your Highness.

Brace Yourself, Summer is Coming

After ridiculously long hiatus, the Society once again gathered to test themselves in the arts of strategy and tactics. By camouflaging their gathering in compulsory birthday practices, they were able to test themselves once again with mysteries devised by Lord Protector Jakubias while gaming. Only Sir William was missing but he was replaced by Jounir the General Superior.

Society's Horror collection

the Monster Cup

First our gentlemen tested themselves with the Arkham Horror with Kingsport and The Curse of the Dark Pharaoh expansions. Against all odds they managed to shut and seal all the gates. The Elder God Glaaki was vanished and the world were left in peace. Never before had anyone witnessed such a amount of luck in the form of monster surges. Sip of whiskey for that gents!

By this time, it was time to decide who would rule the Kingdom of Marnon and thus it was time for the legendary boardgame Wizard's Quest aka Marnon. Once again, against all odds, the newcomer Jounir managed to conquer the island by locating all three hidden treasures. Well done Jounir!

Encouraged by his victory, Jounir presented a small card game for the rest of the society, called "We Didn't Playtest This At All" which proved to be really hilarious game, especially after few pints. Well done Jounir again!

The evening was crowned by lost diamond from the Eighties, The Barbarians adventure movie. The Society agreed that the movie was pure gold.

Hatespeech at the religious retreat of Gustaf Hideout

The Society gathered at the Gustaf's Hideout 9th - 11th of September 2011 Anno Domini

For some unknown reason the Society squashed to Sir Williams warSaab and began an incredible journey to a small cabin located somewhere in Southern Finland, yet the excact location was kept in secresy even from the members themselves. Rainbows and unicorns spurred them on their way and everyone knew that they took part of something best described as "legendary".

It was friday evening as they reached the hideout. After unpacking their gear, they began their mission of full ablution by playing Dungeons & Dragons until midnight. As the days chores were fullfilled, it was time to take up the booze, and rest of the evening was filled with drunken "hatespeech." It was collectively agreed that xXx2 was utter shit, whereas Demi Moore's  full-of-life eighties "classic" "About Last Night..." was solid gold, even though we missed every single sex scene!



As friday night was concluded with two episodes of That 70's Show about 04.00am, saturday morning started 0830am with a montage-theme song from Disney movie "Mulan". Following this epic start, the gentlemen contended with D&D once again, and did not stop not until twelve hours later. Then began what everyone were waiting for. The Meat Feast! An incredible carnival of carnal lust! Everyone feasted with tremendous amounts of meat and beer, and as the feast concluded the Sauna was ready to bathe our brave carnivores. Ominous fullmoon greeted the gents as they plummetted to cold embrace of sea, howling like wolves at the moon.

Later, as the troupe returned to the cabin, fresh & clean and drunk, a movie viewing began, as the The Rock exploded into everyones consciousness. King Jannek roamed the dreamlands while others watched the movie, he was feeling quite sick. After the movie, several rounds of Tekken 5 sobered even poor mister Jannek, while others continued on their trek to Greater Drunkeness.

As the mortal brawling proved to boring, new ways of drunken activity had to be invented, and so came the King & Slave, König und Neger: Die Negerkriegs in the reichlanguage. The basic principles of the game were introduce in the Cabinmeet Vol.1 almost excactly a year ago, and this time the Gents added the Negerkriegs-expansion set, a way for the slave to work his way up, by drinking.

Here are the basic rules of  König und Neger:

The deck of cards is shuffled and dealed to the players. (When more than five players, two decks should be used to increase sheer randomness) Then everyone may sort his hand from 2's to ace's. Then the one with 2 of clubs begins by placing the card (and anyother 2's he may have) tp the center of the table. Then the players in clockwise order strike cards on the last one, providing the card is bigger than the last one ( 3's over 2's, queen's over 8's for example).

You may even strike ace's over 2's. You may also strike multiple numbers of the same size, but then everyone else has to strike equal or more in number of the same size. (For example, three 6's are on the table, next player has to strike at least three 7's).

If the player cannot or doesn't want to strike, he/she must pronounce "pass", which he/she continues to say at his turn as long he's unable or unwilling. If everyone passes, the player who stroke the last card(s) can strike whatever he likes to a clean table (this often means the lowest in size as they are the weakest). It should be noted that ace's are almost omnipotent as they are unmatchable in size, guaranteeing a clean table to the player who stroke it. Altough, you have to match the number of the last sizes in the table, three kings can be only matched with three ace's or more.

The One who first runs out of cards becomes the KING, sole champion of the round. The others continue to play until one loses by being the only one with cards in his hands. He/she becomes the SLAVE, lowest of the low. When the next round begins and the shuffled cards are once again dealt, the King gives two (or three, decided by the players in the beginning of the game) of his LOWEST cards in his hand to the Slave, who has to give equal number of his HIGHEST cards to the King. And then the player with 2 of clubs begins the round.

But now comes the fun part, the Slave may challenge the King before the cards are dealt. If the king accepts he must face the Slave in series of rounds of indianpoker, if he passes, he loses his King-status and the round starts like the beginning round of the game, no high/low cards. If the Slave wins, he becomes the King and the fallen King becomes the Slave.

The rules of these negerkrieg's are simple, both of the players lift a card from the deck to his forehead so one sees only the opponents card, and then the players either say pass of I challenge. If either one passes, sips of booze are taken and new cards are drawn. If both challenge, the one with bigger card in his forehead wins, and the one with lower loses and has to drink a shot (or other standardized measure of alcohol) of booze. The Slave always has the iniatitive as he began the wars, so he has to choose first if a undeciding stalemate is to occur.

Slave doesn't have to challenge the King, but this is recommended as he sucks otherwise. And after the negerkriegs, the cards are shuffled and dealt and the round continues until new King is crowned, or the last continues his reign (which is likely to occur without the negerkriegs, as he holds better cards).

In addition to the Challenge rules, players are encouraged to drink outrageously while they play. Questions?

After Jakubias had lost the Negerkriegs several times in a row, the evening ceased and silence reigned once again. Then came sunday, and the hangover. The warSaab launched it's ride towards civilization. Everyone sweated in terror as they knew that upcoming Vol.3 would surpass the late-Vol.2 in every single level.

More meat, more booze, more Disney montages, more everything. Oh my...

Oh yeah, and cuz the gents missed em, here's Demi Moore's breasts.

Millenia of Warfare for the Crown of Britain!



Probably the most stupidest way to introduce a
boardgame cover, this time with a English
LongbowWoman that doesn't even take place
on the timeline of the events in Britannia!!!



Once again our the Society gathered to battle for one's supremacy, this time with Lewis Pulsipher's boardgame called Britannia. Four of the gents participated, only Sir William was absent as he wasn't even invited at all!



British Isles at the time of
Romans



 Nevertheless the millenia of struggle for the Isles ensued, and ceased after approx. 5hours of gameplay, paused only by the Gents to nourish with various blueberry-based delicacies such as blueberrypie and blueberrysmoothies.



Emperor Masamund (the reds) proved to be victor with 255points and Lord Protector Jakubias (the blues) runned to 246, close one. King Jannek (the yellows) stayed at 195point as Count Oscar ( the greens) failed at nearly everything and was last with 154 points.

 

For the record and for some thrilling statistics, here are the invidual scores for the tribes/nations!



The Isles, about 802ad



The Greens:

Jutes 6p, Danes 36p. Caledonians 51p, Welsh 61p

 

The Yellows:

Romano-British 2p, Dubliners 10p, Scots 22p, Norwegians 40p, Roman 121p

 

The Blues:

Belgae 26p, Normans 49p, Picts 78, Angles 90p

 

The Reds:

Norsemen 20p, Irish 21p, Brigantes 53p, Saxons 161p

 

And as the Gents dispute for the rule of Britannia, they may compare their numbers to these hereby presented! And Sir William will never know about it!



New Loot!

The Society has freshly acquires two new items to it's collections.



First there's this new boardgame called Marnon. It originates to 1970's with the name Wizard's Quest but Marnon is the name for european/scandinavian release at late 1980's.

In Marnon the players oppose eachother as kings struggling for the rule of the island of Marnon. Each king commands his army against the others, orcs and a dragon, while wizard Peacemaker aid each side. One who discovers three items of power first, wins the game. Items are Crown, Ring and a Treasure Chest.

The society playtested the game with the Inner Five, and game took few hours. Even though it basically rolls around the luck with dice, Marnon possesses quite potent amount of strategy as each player tries to balance his forces for defending and for conquest, as bloodshed around him grows turn by turn. Nice!

Marnon proved to be extremely entertaining and became instant-hit with strong classic-status.

4,5/5 Shoggoths

Another article freshly plundered is propably the last Dungeons & Dragons 3.5edition book that Society will ever purchase. Local "hobby shoppe" Fantasiapelit still had one copy of D&D 3.5e Rules Compendium!!! Book greatly features all the essential rules of 3.5edition as a quick reference and thus it is a welcomed addition to Societys D&D games. Well done!

5/5 Shoggoths

ps. big fuck you, 4th edition!

The Society Disagrees: Sucker Punch (2011)

Few of the gents felt masochist enough to view the new movie Sucker Punch. One can't declare it as utter shit with no script that makes sense, as most of its plot worked in several meta-levels. One can even think that as an achievement of some sort.

Anyhow, view the movie, condemn it, then think again and browse few http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0978764/ posts and enlighten OR condemn it again!

Two Gents discovering the essence of Doom

Lord Protector Jakubias, escorted by Sir William, took part of a strange gathering at Klubi, Turku, second of april. There were bards and musicians who had crossed vast oceans in order to chant their doomy songs to them, and well they did. Lord Protector Jakubias even captivated few clips of video to share.

GATES OF SLUMBER

PLACE OF SKULLS

Banishing the Elder Gods, once again!

The Society gathered at Sir Williams profound SlamPad 11th of December 2010AD

Year 2010 was drawing to its end and so The Society decided to gather their forces for one last evening of gaming. Luckily they did so, cause it soon became apparent that Cthulhu was 'bout to awaken from his slumber in R'lyeh.

They hit the boards at Sir Williams notorious Slampad, possibly the last bastion of freedom. After quick tour in this Gomorra & Sodom-All-In-One we spread our equipment on a table and yet another epic game of Arkham Horror was 'bout to begin. We used the Dunwich Horror- and Black Goat of the Woods-expansions. On the right one may see a good picture of card decks this combination featured.

The game itself went quite well and for a moment victory was pausable but as always, the last hope of mankind faded quickly as time runned short. It was possibly cause of lack of monster surges that prevented us to seal enough of gates and also few turns of bad luck. Nevertheless, the Investigators failed and Great Cthulhu rose from his underwater city of R'lyeh.

Battle against the Ancient One was fierce and once again everybody questioned the usability of Epic Battle optional deck that sure makes the battle even more difficult. At their best the investigators managed to lower Cthulhus doom track to eight tokens but then the Elder God used it's special manouver known as Flabby Maw or so, and three of the five investigators was devoured instantly! What a setback! Soon all the rest of the brave investigators were also eaten by that malicious entity, and the game was lost, the mankind had suffered it's final doom.

This terrible loss did not lower the general celebration of passing year and we decided to match our skills with true art of war, the Worms! Here below a authentic picture from that battle of the titans. Everyone else but Jakubias won at least one match, poor Jakubias, such a feeble man.

Later they went to movies to watch the "Matchete" movie, a excellent end for the game year 2010.

Galactical Conquest!

The gathering was held 30th of October 2010 at Count Oscars newly acquired Hidden Chamber

Tidings across the galaxy! We conjured ourselves to Count Oscars grand manor and to his Hidden Chamber to be precise. Way to the chamber was perilous, and it somehow reminded us of one post-apocalyptic rpg whichs name is better to be left unmentioned. Anyhows, there was six of us, as Sir William was carrying on his little big adventure in some remote island kingdom far far away, but luckily High Admiral Jouni of Sol (previously known as Le Jouni) and Sami the Great Bitch of Naalu (previously known as Saminovitzs) stepped out in order to achieve suitable number of participants.

And so we played Twilight Imperium with Shattered Empires expansion. Jakubias of the Pussycats ruled the Emirates of Hacan, Masamund the Pureblooded governed the mysterious Winnu, Wormface Oscar lived among the insect race of Sardak Nor, High Admiral Jouni commanded the unlucky fleets of Federation of Sol and the Great Bitch Sami raised anger with his Naalu Collective and Jannek the Brilliant Light shone amongst the Embers of Muaat.

It was decided that the galaxy would be huge, so the game spanned to over 10 hours, and still the participants had to call it quits as they tired to each other. Most of the game everyone just amassed more planets my conquering their neighbourhooding systems. Notable events during the game was collective decision to shun Sami and his Naalu's, as they were found to poorly balanced race with their ability to be the first in every single fucken iniative. Masamund was the only one to advance his technology to the level of War Suns, not counting the one warsun of the Embers of Muaat that Jannek had. Also, Jakubias and his Hacan race managed to trade their excrements to Sardak Nor of Oscar in exchange of gold which the worms found unuseful. Jannek was the one to conquer Mecatol Rex, but other than these few happenings, the game was bit dull, like Wormface Oscars chamber, as seen on the right side of text.

Nevertheless, playing Twilight Imperium is always exciting and the game is just massive, if only there would be more suitable days to sacrifice to this behemoth, as routine would slice off some downtime which is mostly caused by arguments and poor overal memory of rules. It was decided that sequel match would take place in near future.

Our gents listened some terrible music handpicked by Lord Protector Jakubias: The Puritan - Lithium Gates, Candlemass - Nightfall, Death Breath - Stinking up the Night, Electric Wizard - We Live, Red Harvest - Sick Transit Gloria Mundi, Bal-Sagoth - The Chthonic Chronicles, Black Breath - Heavy Breathing, Iron Maiden - Matter of Life and Death, Thergothon tribute album and a Star Wars Soundtrack!

Touch of Western

A weekend in Gustaf's hideout proved to be quite success in terms of playing Dungeons & Dragons. Unluckily, after the hard adventuring, we needed some refreshments, and in the saturday evening, after sauna and delicious grill meals, people got into the drinking side, so our plans for playing Matt Snyder's the Dust Devils rpg was quite frankly, ruined.


We made the charachters alright, Count Oscar chose to be Shaun McKoy, a miner who had a terrible accident with dyunamite in his earlier life.
King Jannek wanted to be Four-finger Tom, ex-military man who befriended with indians but in fear of losing his comrades trust, he slaughtered the poor indian family that once saved his life. Terrible story..
Emperor Masamund knew he would be Betsy-Lou, a harlot who had murdered her two childern, the backgrounds are getting even worse...
And last but not least, Sir William chose to be El Nobo, mexican man who had slaughtered his whole home village for money!!! What a real asshole!
And Lord Protector Jakubias was the dealer, balancing the events and dealing cards.


Jakubias had planned a exciting bank robbery adventure in the town of Red Hill, but it soon became clear that in the overall state of drunkness, good gaming would not be achieved. And soon it was all over, El Nobo, Shaun Mckoy and Fourfinger Tom shot themselves after blowing the bank to smithereens, and poor Betsy-Lou was raped and later shot to dead. Never rob a bank when you're drunk.


After the terrible killing in the wild west, we played some cards, game known as "King & Nigger" (according to few webpages, its also known plain nigger, or slave, altought it intends not to be racist, the name could be King & Peasant, and you would also get the idea of victor and loser swapping cards) which escalated into indian poker for few of us, which resulted in sir William losing multiple times in row, and as the others took drony positions and watched Star Wars episode III middle of the night, sir william constantly wetted himself with his breverages..
Awful night of awful drinking.

Reinact of the Great War

Sermon was held 29th of August 2010 at the Altar of Games




We had two guests, comrade Saminovitz and Le Jouni, starring our day of classical boardgame Diplomacy. After quick catch-up with the rules the warfare begun. After six hours of intense negotiation the Turkish Empire (played by Sultan Oscar) had made a spearpoint attack all away to southern germany (ruled by Kansler Jannek), destroying the puny Austria-Hungary (wimpped by William the Wasted) on its way. Gueststar Saminovitz and his Russian horde pressed prime minister Jakubias and the British empire from the east, whilst Le Jouni, cunning dictator of the French hammered poor Jakubias from west with his baguette. All this time, Don Masamund sucked the tit of the shewolf of Rome and boosted the exctinction of Austrian Ninja race. On the right side one can see the destroyed ninja.



Summary of the day was, Turkey, Russia and French would have battled for the victory, Germany and Great-Britain would have succumbed as collateral damage along the way, while Italy would have stayed isolated until someone of the big boys should decide to destroy it. But in gameterms, other players drawed/stalemated but William lost with his Austria, an happy ending suitable for all. Big thanks for our guest appearances Saminovitz and Le Jouni, may thy swords be blunt.


Evening was accompanied by Reverend Bizarre-So Long Suckers II, Howl-Full of Hell, Dark Side of Classical Music-cd1, Manowar-Sign of the Hammer, Neurosis-The Eye of The Storm and Umbra Nihil-The Borderland Ritual

Das List um Kerken und Drachen

This is the complete list of Dungeons & Dragons 3edition & 3.5 books that the Society owns. The books are scattered around the underground tunnels beneath the Altar of Games, but lord protector Jakubias has oathed to gather and archive them all.

For DM's: (23 items)

1. Dungeon Master's Guide
2. Dungeon Master's Guide 3.5
3. Monster Manual
4. Monster Manual 3.5 Premium Print
5. Monster Manual II
6. Monster Manual III
7. Fiend Folio
8. Book of Vile Darkness
9. Draconomicon
10. Libris Mortis
11. Manual of the Planes
12. Frostburn
13. Cityscape
14. Stormwrack
15. Dungeonscape
16. Magic Item Compendium
17. Stronghold Builder's Guidebook
18. Weapons of Legacy
19. Arms & Equipment Guide
20. Deities and Demigods
21. Expanded Psionic Handbook
22. Book of Exalted Deeds
23. Rules Compendium

Player's: (15 items)

1. Player's Handbook (3copies)
2. Epic Level Handbook
3. Complete Warrior
4. Complete Champion
5. Complete Adventurer
6. Complete Divine
7. Complete Mage
8. Complete Arcane
9. Psionic Handbook
10. Races of Destiny
11. Races of the Wild
12. Races of Stone
13. Tome and Blood

Campaign settings: (10items)

1. Forgotten Realms Campaign Setting
2. Underdark
3. Monster Compendium: Monsters of Faerûn
4. Races of Faerûn
5. Magic of Faerûn
6. Player's Guide to Faerûn
7. Faiths and Pantheons
8. Dragonlance Campaign Setting
9. Bestiary of Krynn
10. Living Greyhawk Gazetteer

Awesome total of 48 so far.

Example of an event

Arkham Horror + Kingsport expansion

Twilight Imperium + expansion

Settlers of Catan

Hail and Greetings

This blog is and will be a complete list of nights full of boardgame gaming.